Ask Sue
A Weekly Q&A Column About Professionalism, Etiquette and Problems in the Workplace
by Sue Morem

Office Romance Gone Bad

Dear Sue: I'm a single woman and I had an affair with my boss. Just before our affair ended I told my boss in good faith about an incident with two of my colleagues that had upset me. Up until that time I was on good terms with my colleagues. We all work in an open space and work facing each other the entire day.

I found out that my boss told my two colleagues what I said about them and now they're both angry at me for what I said. They told me not to talk to them ever again and have turned my other colleagues against me. Even my boss, who was my lover, is now cold and distant.

I asked to be transferred to a different department which seems to have upset my boss even more. He is now refusing to talk to me and is encouraging others to bully me even more. What should I do?

- Desperate

Sue Says: Hang in there. You have taken steps to get out of what has become a difficult situation and hopefully you will soon be on your way. The best you can do now is to learn from what has happened and start anew. Hold your head high and know the difficult situation you must endure is temporary. Don't let your boss or anyone get the best of you. Stay strong--you've lost a lot already. Keep in mind that people who bully you want to get the best of you, but you don't have to allow them to succeed. I wish you the best and I hope you'll let me know how you are doing.

Sue Morem is a professional speaker, trainer and syndicated columnist. She is author of the newly released 101 Tips for Graduates and How to Gain the Professional Edge, Second Edition. You can contact her by email at asksue@suemorem.com or visit her web site at http://www.suemorem.com. 

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